Living 40FIED – Mental and Physical Resilience for Men Over 40: Stories of Practical Wisdom

Being in my late 40s, I thought straight away that a book about building mental and physical resilience for men over 40 sounded just perfect for me. Not that I think I lack either, but I have the opinion that I can always learn something new.

Tamas Finta, the author of this book, starts with his own journey to become a personal trainer. He describes the loss of his father, when he was just 54 years old, as a pivotal moment in his life. Struggling with depression, Tamas’ father stopped moving and exercising during his forties, drank and smoked more, and his health deteriorated.

For me, there is a powerful message in this first chapter of the book, as we all know someone who has suffered from disease or death, or who has simply stopped doing sport at the level they used to—way too early for their age. This prompted Tamas to change his life, leaving his career in banking and moving to Australia to start a journey that culminated in him opening his training studio. Tamas then describes how, when he turned 40 himself, he developed a passion for helping people overcome pain or limitations so they can continue, or return to, activities that had been lost to them.

Get The book: Living 40FIED: Building Mental And Physical Resilience For Men Over 40

When I started reading the book, I was intrigued because Tamas had dedicated it to men in their forties. I thought that many of the values described in the book, such as discipline or mobility, would apply to women as well. I had a chance to ask him this question, and he was very kind to explain his choice: being a male trainer in his fifties, he has his own experience of how his body responds now compared to what it used to do in the past. “Authenticity is very important to me, and I don’t believe I can speak genuinely about a woman’s psychology or physiology without having lived that experience myself.”

“The second reason is that men often need a bit of a kick to start taking care of themselves. I’ve had countless female clients who spent months or even years persuading their husbands to see me… Women tend to have less ego when it comes to asking for help in areas they don’t fully understand. Women over 40 are also generally more proactive about their health, while men are more likely to wait until something goes wrong before addressing it.”

I must say these are very good points, and I totally agree with him. What I realised during the email exchange, and through reading this book, is how passionate he is about helping other people—either by passing on the knowledge gained through his personal experience, or the experience he has gained working with his clients.

Now, I have read quite a few training or wellness books, and this one is really different. Instead of the usual guide where you read the opinion and approach of the author, with exercises, advice, or even cooking recipes, each chapter features an interview with an expert sports practitioner or trainer. In all cases, they have continued to train through their 50s or even 60s, sometimes against setbacks like disease, or a busy life running a business or having a family.

Get The book: Living 40FIED: Building Mental And Physical Resilience For Men Over 40

In each chapter, Tamas introduces his guest and then has a conversation about training, their life, and their achievements. They discuss how they prepared for those challenges and their motivation, and at the end of the chapter there are three reflection questions distilled from the conversation.

The subjects of the interviews are coaches and trainers in very varied disciplines, like martial arts, mobility, kettlebells, or Antarctic expeditions. You are likely to find a story that resonates with your experience and will motivate you to explore a training discipline or make a small improvement in your health and fitness path.

Just to give a few examples, I really liked the analogy of the Ferrari in the garage from Shaun Cairns. He is a StrongFirst certified master instructor, and he teaches kettlebell and barbell to instructors to get qualified. Their conversation leads to this comparison: we all moved well during our 20s, but we parked the Ferrari in the garage and expect to come back 20 years later and drive it at full speed. In the same way the car would need a service, our bodies need a check of our mobility.

The story of Geoff Wilson, an endurance athlete who has set several records in Antarctica, is just fascinating. They discuss the science behind his incredible feats of endurance, but also his way of tackling life, where he embraces challenge and discomfort.

Although I am not new to structured training and strength work, some of the training techniques discussed in the book are new to me. I know very little about training with kettlebells, and I have only heard briefly about crawling exercises to improve mobility. After reading the book, I have found myself researching these topics and trying to introduce them into my routines. I guess this is the point of the book: to make you reflect on your situation and consider some changes.

Many of the conversations talk about reframing problems or adversity, like the interview with Dave Whitley, or the story of Bill Lee-Emery on how to transform a tragedy like a cancer diagnosis into a growth opportunity—where he started a deep connection with his body and a deeper appreciation of life.

Really well written, and with a new story in each chapter, I have thoroughly enjoyed this book. I also enjoyed rereading chapters to compile this review. I have no doubt that every reader will find something that resonates with their experience, regardless of where they are on their path to wellness and fitness.

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Links
Tamas Finton’s website: 40fiedmenshealth.com.au/

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